I had an appointment with my psychologist yesterday and at one point we were talking about how I have replaced my social life with scrapbooking. I have social anxiety & instead of trying to work through it I have given in completely and spend all my spare time at home scrapbooking. Many people have commented that I am a scrapping machine, but the truth is, I'm just lonely. I want to be out there hanging out with people & meeting new people, but I find that all really hard, so I just give in to my fears & anxiety. And now I've gotten to a point with my scrapbooking where I feel I need to be constantly scrapbooking. If I'm at home & I'm not scrapping I feel lazy. If I don't complete at least 5 or 6 pages a day I feel like a failure. And my psychologist pointed out to me how unhelpful this all is. Scrapbooking is not going to fill my need for friendship, and hiding away each weekend is just going to pull me further into depression.
So, I'm not saying that I'm going to give up scrapping. My psychologist also pointed out that it's great that I have a hobby that I love & am so passionate about, but she's helped me see that it has taken over my life, but is not fulfilling all my needs. So I'm going to try to spend more of my free time hanging out with friends & meeting new people. It's not going to be easy, I've already been seeing my psychologist for over a year, & though I can see that I've come a long way, I still get caught up in my social anxiety.
Scrapbooking is important because it is a way to remember & honour those special people & moments in my life, so I'm definitely going to keep at it, I just don't want to be so caught up in scrapping all weekend, or feeling that I need to complete a certain number of pages or trying to do one whole album in a weekend. Now that is going to be hard, seeing as I am going to a 10 hour scrapping day tomorrow! Last time I finished 10 pages, whereas most people did 3 or 4, and that is because I didn't spend any time socialising. I just sat down and scrapped. So this time I am going to try to be less caught up in trying to make heaps of layouts, and spend more time chatting & appreciating the lovely ladies I will be scrapping with.
Thankyou for taking the time to read this rather long post, I just really needed to jot all this down & let it all out.
Friday, May 2, 2008
Stop Scrapping Start Socialising
Posted by Haylee at 7:56 AM
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6 comments:
Thank you for being so open and honest Haylee. You are so encouraging to me.
At least at the scrapping day you will not be sitting by yourself! It is a social day as well as a scrapping day. (although sometimes with all the big personalities there it is easier to sit and listen)
See you there!
Haylee - my first thought when I read your post was that your psychologist needs to take up scrapbooking! She just needs to know how addictive, fulfilling and fun it is!
But really, maybe I should be taking your psychologists advice! I spend way too much time scrapbooking and not enough time socialising too. Just this year I have begun making friends through my scrapbooking. I'm liking this new journey of socialising at crops, meeting my new scrapbooking friends for coffee and keeping in touch with them through the week. But it doesn't come easily. I spend a lot of time praying that God would help me be brave.
Good on you for seeking balance - it's ok if you go a day, a weekend without completing lots of layouts.
Will pray that you will have a great day out cropping tomorrow and that you will find a balance between talking and scrapping!
Big hugs Haylee. Thanks for your honesty. As someone who is currently suffering depression I know how easy it is to try and cover up your problems instead of solve them. Congratulations to you for taking the biggest step in admitting the issue and working out what you need to do to help solve it.
I'll be there tomorrow and I'll make sure you get some Annie-time. Wander around the room carrying her. It's a great way to talk to people without feeling too threatened. People naturally seem to want to chat with someone holding a baby!
*hugs*
Haylee, I know it's hard to over come ur fear ( socialising ) but u will get there, yes it's hard to start making friends especially when u have depression but U are off to a great start just by talking open about it.
You are such a beautiful girl you just need to realise this and see that what's on the inside is the real person.
I want to hear that you had a fun day chatting along with all the ladies tomorrow, Have a wonderful day!!
Haylee you are a gorgeous girl, I am really looking forward to meeting you at the SofF Retreat later this year. Enjoy today, scrapbooking days are as much a social day as a scrapbooking day, I am also praying that you will find a balance between scrapbooking which is something you love and socialising, which is something a little harder.
Look Hayles i feel if you enjoy scrapping then dont stop. Most of the time you attend scrapbook workshops and you socialise with many of people.
You have always been a quite, laid back person what do they want to turn you into a lout and be like me... Gee there is hope i could get Mark and I working on you.
Look we cont see much of each other but i am here if you ever want to talk or get away from home. DH works away all week so its just the kids ad I we would love the company. we could do tea.Pizza Yummmmmmmmm i love pizza. and i can guarentee mone would love company too.
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